Are you scared to death of sharks? Would you do whatever it takes to make sure you never get attacked? You've come to the right place! I've got all sorts of tips for you on how to keep those dastardly creatures off your back.
First of all, if you're going to be in the water, you should wear a shark costume. That way, the sharks won't recognize you! They'll think you're just another of their own kind! They wouldn't eat their own kind. That's cannibalism.
Disclaimer: If you actually try some of these tips, you will die. It's supposed to be funny. If you can't tell the difference, I don't know that you should be allowed out of the house in the first place.
Now click through for some more ideas!