X

We detected that you're visiting our site from the UK. Would you like to visit the ChaCha UK website?

Confucius Joke

Confucius Joke

Confucius jokes are humorous takes on how Confucius, if he were alive today, had a dirty mind, and an endless stream of pop culture and sex topics, would share his wisdom.

News from Around the Web

Previous Next

Top Questions Asked on ChaCha.com for Confucius Joke

In the Last:
Month

  1. What are some funny Confucius jokes?

    Man who eat many prunes get good run for money. Man who run i...

  2. Can you send me confucius jokes?

    Confucius says that a man who runs in front of a car gets tir...

  3. Confucius joke?

    Confucius Say: Grease monkey who go to bed without bathing wa...

  4. What is a Confucius joke about women and earth?

    Confucius say: Man who has woman on ground has piece on earth...

  5. Can I have a Confucius joke?

    Confucius Say... * Grease monkey who go to bed without bathin...

Top Questions Asked on ChaCha Mobile for Confucius Joke

In the Last:
Week | Month

  1. How about another Confucius says joke?

    Confucius say: "Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up wit...

  2. What are more Confucius jokes?

    Confucius Say...Man who drive like hell bound to get there. C...

  3. What is a confucius joke?

    Confucius say, man who fart in church, sit in own pew. Thanks...

  4. Confucius jokes?

    Man who run in front of car get tired.

  5. What is a good confucius joke?

    Confucius says America good place to put Chinese restaurant.

  1. What is a confucius joke?

    Confucius say, man who fart in church, sit in own pew. Thanks...

  2. Confucius jokes?

    Man who run in front of car get tired.

  3. What are some funny Confucius jokes?

    Man who eat many prunes get good run for money. Man who run i...

  4. How about another Confucius says joke?

    Confucius say: "Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up wit...

  5. Can you give me a Confucius joke?

    Confucius says: Man who lose key to apartment not get new key...

About Confucius Joke

Confucius was a Chinese philosopher born on September 28, 551 BCE in Qufu, Zhou Dynasty. Confucius came from poor beginnings. He was raised by his mother as his father died when he was young. She was unable to provide much for him but one thing she insisted on was that Confucius study hard and learn as much as he could about everything. As an adult he became a teacher, eager to spread the wealth of knowledge.

China began to take a downward turn in the 6th century and morals began to suffer. In fact that time was known as The Great Moral Decline. This horrified Confucius who believed that only when people work together peacefully, respect each other and always look out for each other the world would be a place of happiness for all. He used his position as a teacher to revive the moral teachings of sages from the past to in hopes of bringing the world into peace and harmony.

Confucius died in 479 B.C. but his students ensured that he would never be forgotten. They gathered their notes and recorded his philosophical sayings and continued teaching and spreading his message to anyone who would listen. The teachings became a religion called Confucianism which eventually spread throughout China, Taiwan, Korea and Vietnam.

From this venerable origin has come the modern Confucius Joke. A humorous take on how Confucius, if he were alive today, had a dirty mind, and an endless stream of pop culture and sex topics, would share his wisdom. Here are only a few of the thousands of Confucius jokes:

*Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.

*Don't drink and park - accidents cause people.

*State of pregnancy exist when woman takes seriously something poked in fun.

*He who buries a man's wife alive, should not expect to sit at that man's dinner table without the subject coming up.

*Baseball all wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.

*House without toilet is uncanny.

*Baseball all wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.

*House without toilet is uncanny.

*Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.

*Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep sh*t.

*Man who lay woman on ground gets piece on earth.

Created by ExtraordinarilyYours

Recent Confucius Joke Questions

PREV 1 2 3 4 5 6 NEXT
103 Answers
Advertisement
›
›
›
›
Confucius Joke